yes i know it has been AGES since i pour down my thoughts here, gosh how time flies...my last post was abt a year ago!! well, lots and lots of things happened along the trail. i finally, i repeat, i finally got married nov 07. i always thought that i will never have someone to share my life with. it has been a very long journey for me, it took me about a year to battle thru to be finally united to the chosen soul. i was fighting lots with emos & feelings to get mom's blessing. and eventually with all the support i have from my siblings, dad, relatives, friends i managed to brave thru it. i'm just so thankful to all the souls who have been there for me, i can't thank god enough for this, alhamdulillah.

looking back thru the years, my life is all about fighting, battling to be in control of myself, to do what i want to do, to go where i want to be. i never have myself when everything is being watched and decided for, not till few years back. too many sad, bad things that i wondered till now how did i ever managed thru that all and the best thing is the world didnt have any clue, not even those who are close to me! i am always a chirpy person as people see, a person for a friend to call in the middle of night to inform she had broke up with boyfriend or to share a secret that she had a boob job done, for siblings to call anytime when they are in need, for a niece to ask to buy her a new pencilbox. no i'm not complaining, i am proud to be all ears and shoulders to those who see me as being capable and reliable to ease their burden a bit if not more. yes, i have never put myself first and that has what put me in with the situation.

well, the pursuit is still on-going, this is what my life is all about...striving for happiness, peace & harmony...... solitary.

Message

My mind is wandering around lately, looking and searching into my ownself to find out the missing patch within. Been told to do some introspection. It has been that prolong postponement to decide what i like to to, what i want to do, something that feeds the soul and gives me internal value later on. I would normally ignore emails on astrological readings or anything of that sort but...this one had really put me in thinking cap...


~~This week I thought I would draw a Tarot card to help you with a decision that you've been thinking about making. The card I unveiled is quite telling. It is the Hermit, and calls for introspection. This card is telling me that you should hold off for a bit before making your decision. If you jump in too soon, you could have second thoughts later. The Hermit suggests that you need some time for reflection and solitude, a period of soul-searching. You need to apply a little more patience, if you want things to work out the way that they are supposed to. The reason for this is that everything always happens for a reason. Play the waiting game right now, instead of launching into something you're not quite ready for headfirst. You may even want to spend some time in quiet meditation. This can calm you from within, and put you in a better frame of mind in which to make a reasonable decision when the time comes. The Hermit suggests that this kind of practice would be good for you right now.~~

Ponder

"A bad dream is not easy to forget...what more a bad reality. Betrayal is so much more difficult to handle than a feeling of loss from a death."

Congratulations!

Watched Anugerah Juara Lagu yesterday only with hope that the song Terlalu Istimewa composed by Azlan, sang by Kak Dib wins this time. My adrenalin rushed & i screamed of joy when they announced the song that already won best ballad also bagged the best song of all 3 categories. A sweet revenge huh Azlan after AIM! I'm so happy for Azlan, i immediately sent him a text msg. Now knowing that my talented mr. shy-guy friend is $$$ richer, i'm only waiting a call frm him to belanja me...he ows me one though.hehee..

Welcome 2007

Happy New Year 2007!! A bit sad that my new year did not start in a cheerful way, nevertheless i'm quite optimistic that with hardwork, deep faith, encouragement & support from my love ones will bring me to the realisation of my dream. 2006 has been a challenging year for me, all that i take as a learning experience...and yes i'm thankful to God for that and for blessing me with good & joyful moments too. Since 12midnite Jan 1st 2007, my handphone was bombarded with new year messages. Was not feeling well that nite & only the next morning i had the chance to reply, thank you so much to all my darling friends & family who sent me those wishes! Also the email messages i received. The message i like most was from my officemate, thanx dude, here it is;

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"My Happy New Year wish for you is for your best year yet,
A year where life is peaceful, and what you want, you get.
A year in which you cherish the past year's memories,
And live your life each new day full of bright expectancies.
I wish for you a holiday with happiness galore;

And when it's done, I wish you Happy New Year, and many more..."

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